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Not an easy road to Masvingo
Miles, Gays and Lesbians of Zimbabwe (GALZ)
Extracted from Whazzup!, March 2008

For some it might be an easy road, but many will give testimonies of how the road to Masvingo can be a nightmare. Fears of the heavy trucks and the high record of horrific accidents doesn't make it any better.

This journey is significant of the long and thorny road that most gay and lesbian people who reside in Masvingo travel everyday of their lives.

In his testimony as a gay man living in Masvigo, Collen Gweru gives a narration of how his life has been and how due to family pressure he was forced to marry and how his wife later found out about his sexuality and the period after that.

"It's not an easy road to self discovery and accepting one's sexuality especially when you reside in this part of the country, were people can be so conservative. I first discovered that I had emotional feelings for other boys when I was in form one. It was difficult for me to disclose to anyone because I didn't know how people would react.

However at this moment I was already involved with another boy and the relationship was a secret though it lasted until I had finished my Ordinary Level exams.

It is during this period that my family became suspicious because they had never seen me with any woman or heard me talk about women. I only had one male friend who was very close and always there for me. Most of the people I grew up with were getting married and now there were family fears that I had an evil spell cast on me. Some family elders pressurised me into getting married and told me that my mother needed someone to assist her with the house chores. I even insisted that I would help her myself, but they couldn't take that.

Eventually I got married in 2000. The truth is I did it for my mother so she would be proud of me as her last-born son.

In my marriage I was blessed with two children, but still I felt there was something missing in my relationship. I had a male partner and mixing the two was just difficult, I wasn't living my life, or at least one that made me happy.

I couldn't tell my wife that I wanted men and not women. I was depressed most of the time, the fear of hurting my wife's feelings and letting down my family gripped me.

It was not until one day, that my wife caught me red- handed being intimate with my male partner. She was devastated, but she couldn't tell anyone. She caught me two more times at it again. This time she decided to take action, she threatened to report me to the police and that she was going to file for divorce.

At that time I couldn't care less, so I told her the truth, why I married her and that I was in love with another man. Afterwards she actually showed remorse because my revelation had touched her.

We however came to a compromise, she said she would stay for the kids' sake, but asked me not to come home with my partner or 'come out' about my sexuality to other people.

If it doesn't rain, it pours, in 2007, I was a blackmail victim. Someone I knew had discovered that I was gay and wanted to make money out of my secret. It took long to have the matter resolved with the blackmailer. Once again, I was between a rock and a hard place and didn't know whether to report him to the police or pay him. Such is the predicament of most gay men who live secret lives.

It takes a lot of courage for someone to stomach the homophobic attitudes of people here, its not easy. I have taken it upon myself to assist others like me. At the moment I am the Coordinator of the Masvingo Affinity Group, and we are still trying to come up with a homogenous group. The problem we face is that most members are subjected to all sorts of harassment, whilst others are not in good health and need medical assistance and counselling.

We appeal to those responsible to ensure that we have a day organised for us to come to Harare and chat and mix with other people from different areas, sharing experiences at the same time.

I believe that although we might come from different backgrounds, our cause is the same; we need to unite and never tire in our struggle for recognition and respect as people of a different sexual orientation. Nyaya yacho ihombe inotoda munyengetero (this is a crucial issue which needs divine intervention).

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